Tag: health plan

Under Bloomberg and Bernie health plans, first two stents are free

It was a rare moment of harmony in a Democratic debate marked by heated disagreements and a head-spinning array of zingers and takedowns.  Two of the combatants, Democratic frontrunner Bernie Sanders and billionaire challenger Michael Bloomberg, bonded over each having two stents placed in their hearts.  

“I think one area maybe Mayor Bloomberg and I share, you have two stents as well,” said Senator Sanders, gesturing to Mayor Bloomberg who appeared to affirm.  

Sanders deftly utilized the moment of goodwill to launch into a description of his healthcare proposal.  “Under my plan, you get two stents,” said Senator Sanders, holding up two fingers. “You get two stents on the house, then you’re on the hook ten percent for each additional stent.”

Not to be outdone, Senator Elizabeth Warren piped in, “I have two stents also,” she asserted to stunned moderators.  “Yeah, that’s right, I had them put in while my son was away at public school.”

“Under my plan,” Senator Warren continued, “Billionaire’s are allowed to keep their first two stents free and clear, but we’ll remove each additional stent and give it to someone in need.”

The debate hall erupted in cheers while Mayor Bloomberg appeared to grab his chest in a gesture that registered somewhere between relief and panic.