Tag: THCP

Authorities worry powerful new cannabis compound could produce legions of superstoners

The recent discovery of a cannabis compound 30 times stronger than THC by researchers in Italy has some law enforcement officials in the United States more than a little concerned.  The new compound called THCP forms a bond to human cannabinoid receptors 33 times stronger than THC. Once consumed, users are cast into a blizzard of fragmented thoughts and erratic sensations.  The higher cognitive functions become scrambled and the user becomes a slave to uncontrolled impulses. 

“To call these people stoners on steroids would be putting it mildly,” reports Police Chief Eric Whelp of Ocala, FL.  “Early reports describe roving bands of super stoners converging on convenience stores and devouring the entire contents in a matter of minutes.  An impromptu drum circle could pop up anywhere at any time, drawing thousands to the hypnotic rhythms that seem to produce increasingly bizarre behavior.”      

Many have speculated on the origins of the cannabinoid, but It is generally thought the super strength compound somehow made its way onto a research vessel returning from an excursion to Skull Island where scientists were pursuing the elusive Kong.  It is believed that one of the ship’s crew may have accidentally brought the compound on board.  

While scientists struggle to understand what makes it the most potent compound yet discovered, law enforcement officials prepare for unpredictable behavior and potential mayhem.  “We’re staking out the public parks and the Taco Bells,” said Whelp. “If a hack circle spirals out of control, or there’s a run on nachos, we’ll be ready for it.”